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Monday, May 25th, 2009
5:30 am
arent we poster material?

current mood: cold

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 1 Listened To The Rain

Saturday, March 21st, 2009
11:29 pm - deja marie

current mood: apathetic

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

Thursday, April 24th, 2008
12:24 am - the rest of the night....
So I get all comfy and cozy in my p.j.'s and with all my scrapbooking stuff all prepared downstairs in front of the t.v. and freaking Mike texts me saying that he is leaving for the cafe and i need to come, and then i get in the car and Jamie calls me and tells me she is comming too and to come and pick her up....so i drive 15 miles to go get her and end up getting there at like 9 O'CLOCK and we sit there and talk and laugh till like 1015 and then we leave....very interesting. I kinda wanted to stay home but I felt bad that both of us woudn't go if i didn't.

i feel bad i would have rathered scrapbook then go out.

maybe i am more of a homebody....but i only have tomorrow to chill and work on my projects because today and tomorrow are my only days off.....rarr plus tomorrow i have antoher meeting at work so i think i'm going to wake up around noon and go get lunch and srapbook will 5...

plans...we will see.

current mood: distressed

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008
4:10 pm - meet me in the cellar
ok so the baby left me this morning. :( sad. but she's been here for 5 months straight ad i know she needs some alone time with her daddy. mom and dad will be home next friday with , hopefully, enough time to help with the party set up...and yes i will post pictured of my baby girl's 2nd birthday party. it's princess themed...th crazy thing is i have no idea what to get her. mostly becase there is nothing she needs. no clothes, no toy...nothing. oh well i'm sure i'll think of something. this is going to be the first party i will set up myself...i have to get plce a order for the party trays and such. i'm nervous but excited. even being a wife and mother...it's not often i get to do things the way i want an plan them the way i want them. With always people aroud...i feel like a kid cause i' getting told what to do....not the best feeling.

your lucky in that aspect.

ugh i'm full i just ate some frozen pizza.

And I have meeting at work at 1800 and tomorrow I have to help Jamie move and hopefully I will have sometime to scrapbook...which is what i've wanted to do for o long but never had the time. i ave total of like 6 pages done...and non of the wedding...that was almost 3 years ago....i'm pathetic.

well the good news is....well ok i can't think of any at this moment....i'm going to get ready to go to the meeting...traffic is going to be horrible....

i'll update and probably rant about the meeting when i get back

current mood: creative

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 2 Listened To The Rain

Sunday, March 16th, 2008
12:08 am - To Ronnie
I can't feel anything....it's like i'm tricking my mind into thiinking your not really gone...I haven't seen you in soo long...but i the back of my mind I knew you would always be there...you've always been there for me...making sure I was ok and promising never to let go....I only cried when I heard the news...and when Jen called me, but I guess it's still not hit me yet. You were my best friend...and I know i'll see you again

This is all I can say for now...I left this msg on his myspace...because that's the only way left to have my feelings out there...who would have known myspace we be the only way I could connect with my best friend even after he's gone.

I want to cry....but I know if I do i'll never stop. I have a job and a daughter and a house and rent (yea I pay half yo) and things have to be done and with a 2 y/o there is very little time to think let alone morn. I can't have that time now...because even though I went out with my boys and they took care of me cheering me up and such....I trie not to think about him I just want to lay in my bed and cry....just cry and not worry if the baby is going to walk in scared because she hates when mommy cries.

No one understands that I just don't feel like talking...I don't feel like anything. Jamie doesn't understand...neithr does the Husband. Only you do and Mike...you guys get it. I know whe Latasha died he felt the same but...this time it was like a peice of me was taken off of life support.

I didn't feel him...I should have....but I didn't...and I can't figure out why.

current mood: morose

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 1 Listened To The Rain

Thursday, February 28th, 2008
12:56 am - My new shit

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 1 Listened To The Rain

Thursday, November 2nd, 2006
1:18 pm
You are a

Social Conservative
(31% permissive)

and an...

Economic Liberal
(16% permissive)

You are best described as a:


Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid
Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

current mood: creative

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 2 Listened To The Rain

Thursday, October 5th, 2006
9:48 pm

current mood: contemplative

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 1 Listened To The Rain

Tuesday, October 3rd, 2006
8:57 pm - Busy busy
I'm lame. My life is lame. work work work,come home, get yelled at for something or other, spend little time with the monkey, then lather, rinse, repeat. And once a week I get some free time and time with the monkey.

i'm out.

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 3 Listened To The Rain

Thursday, September 7th, 2006
12:01 am - ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
I got some!

current mood: horny

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

Sunday, August 13th, 2006
10:01 pm - Sunflower seeds.
They are yummy. I'm done.

current mood: creative

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

Tuesday, August 8th, 2006
12:05 am

current mood: irate

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

Monday, August 7th, 2006
4:01 pm - New deja-marie pics!

Could she get ANY cuter?

current mood: amused

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 12 Listened To The Rain

3:37 pm - Bastard!
OMG that basatrd deleted everything from hs myspace to make sure I don't cath him again. Man last night was the first time I could truley yell at him and there is NO way it could be my fault! He claimed he did it so he could build some self-esteem to think some girls wanted him (because haveing me around obviously just kills him) and so he sent messages to all these girls saying "Hey you'de look like you'de be fun in bed, lets fuck" and one girl said "Don't you have a wife and kid" and the bastard says "yea but the marraige is fissing"
Then he e-mails his ex girlfriend telling her he still has feelings for her and keeps wishing she were near.
So I confront him in the car. I just right out and say "So are you going to tell me why you are propositioning girls on Myspace?" He gets all quiet and into his self pity thing and I have no emotion at the time but rage. And his excuse "I wanted to feel wanted" Because obviously I'm not good enough.

He will be kissing my feet for the next month.
What bothers me most is what he did to hix ex. Patricia is just like one of the nicest people I know and for him to mess with her head like that. It's horrible. He better freaking tell her it wasn't true.She doesn't deserve that.

current mood: angry

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 7 Listened To The Rain

Sunday, August 6th, 2006
3:47 am - His excuse
Drunk...thats it.

current mood: morose

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

Friday, August 4th, 2006
8:47 pm - I feel bad
But today has been so busy (same as yesterday) but I haven't gone to the gym for 2 days! I feel really lazy.

current mood: distressed

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 6 Listened To The Rain

4:07 am - rar argh meow!!!!


I have to be on this crappy one. I would set up my computer, but it's so riddled with pop-ups, it's not worth it.


current mood: bitchy

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 19 Listened To The Rain

Wednesday, August 2nd, 2006
8:14 am - Grab the nearest book
1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.

The same Teens steeped in songs of hatred for the jews since they could hold a rattle can attend a summer camp hosted by Palistienian Authority. There, war tactics and the military training of childeren is the name of the game. Lieave it to the religion of peace to hold a capm with the theme "fifty years of occupation:we will not forget and we will not forgive."

-Micheal Savage "Liberalism is a Mental Disorder"

current mood: exhausted

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

Tuesday, August 1st, 2006
11:09 pm - Meow
So I'm going to the gym like every single day. Today I didn't do as much because...I just wasn't really in the mood. Husband is being a jerk lately.
I'm sorry but all he does is sit on his butt playing video games! I mean come on! At least TRY to find a job. I know he wants to but he's not making an effort ande I refuse to apply for him online anymore. I want a job too ya know? Don't get me wrong the last two days he's gotten better, he took the baby for the last two nights so i'll give him that. But there is this constant NEED he has for sex, or at least for me to 'get him off'
You know I don't want to at all. I have no sex drive and thats not because he's repulsive to me (thats what he said). I know whats wrong but I refuse to come to terms.

I have Post Partum Depression. I've had it since she was born. And I haven't accepted it. Thats really why i've been going to the gym. The strain and pain of working out helps me forget it. I hate it, I mean I feel so smothered by her, but I don't. She's my baby and I don't want her away from me EVER. But on the other hand I wish we had a nanny. I hate it, I hate feeling this way. I know it's normal to feel overwhelmed, espeially today because she is starting to teeth and she was crying non-stop. Plus she wouldn't sleep at all. She had these brief patterns of just sitting there and babling and it was so cute it made me not mad at her for screaming (not really MAD). I got some of it on tape. It was so cute.
She's actually standing really well. You woulnd't know she was only 3 months old.

Well that's enough for now. It's dad's birthday tomorrow and I have an interview at 3 and we have to set up the little party we are having for him early so I better finish these 3 applications I have to do. You know i've filled out like 30 today and have 13 numbers to fax my resume to, plus three places to call and one to go in to apply. I'm a busy woman. lol

Love you.


current mood: determined

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain .... 3 Listened To The Rain

Thursday, July 27th, 2006
1:07 pm - busy day
So I went to three job intervies today.

The first one was for UnitedHealthCare. Which is an insurence group. I know all I would be doing is answering phones but it's g0od money, 8-5 everyday, I've got the skills for it, I can advance well, and it's got benifits. Plus if I advance I can truley make a career out of it.
The Job interview took 2 hours, no joke. Poor husband out in the car all that time waiting for me.
It was interesting I had to take these tests for like a call center that times you progess and accuracy on taking down information for orders. And then there was a test for your basic knowledge of Windows 98 which of course I passed with Flying Colors! Then there was that whole personality assesment thing which I swear thay have along with every sincgle online application, but I finished before anyone in the group of 12 people got to the middle. Needless to say I think I have a good chance of getting a second interview.

The second one was for a receptionist job at a law firm, but even if I get it, I won't take it because the pay is not worht the gas to get out there (39 minutes without traffic)

the third one was another advertising job. I flat out told them I wouldn't to door to door. My doctor just wouldn't allow it. Needless to say, I don't expect them to call me back.

After all this fun I came home, ate a corn on the cobb, then went out to the gym for 2 hours, worked my ass off, went to dinner(which kinda totally defeats the purpose) and got home around 10 where I proceeded to watch a movie on the downfall of the Third Reich. BTW never watch it because there is a part in the move where one of the women kill her 5 childeren by drugging them (sleepy time) and putting cyanid capsels in their mouths.


I'm going to go make sre the wiggle worm decided to go back to sleep now.

current mood: sleepy

Listen To Each Drop Of Rain

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